My parents worked incredibly hard to make sure life didn’t totally suck. Our bellies were never empty. The roof was always there. They provided hugs, love and they have stuck with me through every single minute of my existence 0n this earth.
Even if I was “out to lunch ” on a few things, I could always feel my parent’s arms around me guiding me through every winding path. That doesn’t mean they agreed with every decision I made. It doesn’t mean we didn’t have some tense moments, but all three of us knew we were in this thing together.
My father taught me that it’s okay for a dad to provide ample comic relief, yet still be a firm voice in times of crappola and doubt. He taught me the importance of a father being able to say, “I love you”. As the years progressed, I have come to understand this remarkable dude even more. There are so many things I see with greater clarity.
Pops showed me the work ethic required to provide for a family. It takes Herculean strength to balance the pressures and demands of the people paying you, with the people you are working to support. There’s not a whole lot of gratitude in the corporate world. Children aren’t wired to thank their parents for electricity and running water. That’s not a knock against the innocence of youth. It’s just the way it is. Parenting is a tough gig.
He always had time for a few impromptu wrasslin’ matches. When you haven’t seen your kids all day a few cleverly executed maneuvers are always appreciated. I continued that tradition with my own family.
Roundhouse Kicks and Guitar Licks
Pops took me to my karate lessons. He celebrated every trophy I won at the big tournaments. More importantly he cheered me up when I left home empty handed. Regular trips to 7-11 included dropping a few quarters into video game machines. Dig-Dug still brings back so many memories for both of us. That was our game. Joust and Q-Bert were the backups when Dig Dug was unavailable.
Big Gulps, Slurpees, and baseball cards were frequently part of the take home goodies. Other times it was a can of soda. My favorite canned beverage was Sarsaparilla. The can had a cowboy on it. He was walking through some saloon doors. This was serious John Wayne/Marshall Dillon stuff. Rounding out my favorite canned beverages, a trio of Welch’s crispiest sodas; apple, peach, and grape. The collectible Happy Days cans were the best.
Mom encouraged me to explore my crazy creative side. No amount of rocker hair, cut up denim, skulls and chains were ever going to blind her from seeing me as her baby boy. She let me play my records loud and proud. When I decided I wanted to learn the craft of playing rawkin’ metal, she pulled together the first incarnation of the sentence, “This is going to be your birthday and Christmas combined”. She took me to H&H Music to get that first guitar. It was a red Peavy Patriot and a Peavy Audition 20 amplifier. Thank you Pops for the Check Book of Kindness.
I shutter to think about how I would have turned out if Mom had not encouraged me to play music. Pops was probably a little more uncertain about the rock n roll thing, but he wasn’t about to force me into some predetermined macho sports role. I dabbled in some little league baseball, but it was clear that school athletics wasn’t going to be in my future. I’m not sure if they knew music would become something I’d stick with for the rest of my life.
Parental Combo
Mother provided the spark. Pops provided the means. They never tried to hold me back from being the oddball artsy rocker son. Our bond grew stronger when they came to see me play live. Heck they even let me take over their living room for band rehearsals even though I lived in another town. That’s definitely one of the coolest things ever.
My mother was there through every heartbreak and poor relationship situation I got caught up in. Even if she didn’t know the details, she knew when I was hurting. Mom taught me the importance of being super flexible while navigating the ever-changing waters of life. I was encouraged to reach for things I would have never tried to hold.
As an added bonus, she showed me how to bring people together with culinary therapy. People smile when food is good and plentiful. Many lifelong memories are made around a bountiful feast.
I love you Mom and Pops . Thank you for always sticking with me, even in those questionable moments. Big hugs and a lotta of “Thank you, Thank you, Thank you” exclamations from your baby boy.
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